Coupling Connection - Dr. Jenn Oikle
Coupling Connection - Dr. Jenn Oikle

Welcome to RelationSmarts!

A Dating, Mating and Relating E-Newsletter

February 6, 2006

Coupling Connection - Home
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Coupling Connection - Pick The Right Partner!
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Coupling Connection - Ask Dr. Jenn
Coupling Connection - Contact Us
Tips and Tools for an Extraordinary Relationship
Coupling Connetion - Relationship Quizzes
Coupling Connetion - Successful Relating
Coupling Connetion - Romantic Rituals
Coupling Connetion - Passion Perks
Coupling Connetion - Reading List
Coupling Connetion - Book Reviews

Every other week, we'll be delivering smart and fresh relating tips. We know you are busy, so let these quick ideas inspire you to create your ideal relationship! Each edition will include helpful information in these three categories:

  • Dating – tips on finding and keeping the perfect partner
  • Mating – take the Passion Perks challenge and perk up your love life!
  • Relating – tips on making your connection Extraordinary

We'll also be including news of note for singles and couples, from Coupling Connection and all around the US, keeping you abreast of relationship happenings you may find useful.

RelationTip: Remember, information is only good if you USE it. Research shows that if you don't use a new piece of information within two weeks, you won't ever use it! So if you want an extraordinary relationship, try something new today!

Did you know that Feb 7- Feb 14 is Marriage Week USA!!!

Celebrate with us by trying the tips below to strengthen your relationship!

Dating: Poofing

I know everyone agrees that the KEY to trouble free dating is honesty! But, not everyone is honest, right? How many times has a new potential partner suddenly disappeared on you? Poof! Without warning: no call, no email, no explanation. Besides being rude, it just makes dating no fun! So make a vow to yourself to NEVER, EVER POOF! The clearer you can make your intentions, the better.

Action Step: Don't leave people hanging. Whether you like someone or not, make sure you find a nice way to let them know!

Want more info on Poofing? Email and we'll send you an article on the subject, complete with a simple strategy to let someone know that you are not interested in pursuing things further.

Mating: Anticipation

Remember when you were a kid? You were so excited about Christmas morning that you couldn't wait to open those presents! That's the power of Anticipation. Anticipation is a tool you can use to spice up any part of your life, but especially your love life. These days, a lot of people get so busy and so tired that they forget about sex! Don't let this happen to you. Try this instead: Plan ahead and pick a time for making love. Then, that morning let your partner know what's in store for them later that day. Flirt like old times. In the afternoon, send them a sexy email or voicemail. During the day, both partners should spend some time thinking about how good it will feel later on- let foreplay take the whole day! Try to get home a little earlier than your partner and set the scene: candles, music, maybe a hot bath, whatever your partner enjoys. If you've both played along all day, you'll be in the mood and ready to go relax together.

RelationTip: If you are a woman, and you take the initiative to get this started, your partner will love it. Don't be afraid to use the power of your imagination during the day to help get you in the mood. If you are a man, focus on letting her know how attractive you find her and how special she is to you, this will increase her desire for physical intimacy.

Passion Perks Challenge: Practice using Anticipation to rev up your sex life.

Relating: Attitude of Gratitude

After a while, most relationships lose their sparkle. But it doesn't have to be this way! Do you know what keeps love alive, year in and year out? An attitude of gratitude! Many people didn't grow up in a super positive household, where people were always expressing appreciation to one another. So, giving compliments doesn't always come naturally. Or if it did, it dwindled after the dating stage. But, frequent appreciation is one of the keys to making your partner feel adored, loved, and cherished! Make it a habit to express your Attitude of Gratitude toward your partner more than once a day.

Action Step: Find something to thank your partner for or let them know you appreciate something. It can be about their behavior or just who they are as a person. Find something else to be grateful for and Repeat.

Want more info on Gratitude? Email and we'll send you a full article about the power of appreciation.

NEWS: For Singles

Sick of being single and ready to get started on your path to the perfect partner?

Take advantage of two exciting opportunities.

Relationship Readiness Inventory

For a limited time, Inventories are half off! Clarify the characteristics of your perfect partner and learn how to get out of your relationship ruts. A powerful step toward an extraordinary relationship. Cost: $40.

*NEW* Teleclass: How to Avoid Marrying a Jerk(ette)

Join other singles to learn everything you need to know to pick the right partner for you and grow a healthy, happy relationship. Info no single should be without! Seriously!

Class will meet by telephone for an hour, once a week for four weeks. Time to be determined by participants' schedules. Cost: $40

Class is also offered as a regular in-person seminar at Singles University in Denver, Colorado. Upcoming classes in March and April. See Coupling Connection website or for more info.

See the website for more information on either of these opportunities or email if you are interested!

Want to learn more? The How To Avoid Marrying a Jerk(ette) program has recently recieved lots of media attention!

- The Feburary 2006 issue of Oprah magazine has an article entitled "What's Timing Got to Do With It?" featuring information about how to grow a healthy relationship from this program.

- The Associated Press recently ran an article about the US military has adopted the Jerk(ette) Program to help it's soldiers make smart relationship decisions and reduce the high military divorce rate. Click on link to read it: AP Article

- Dr. Van Epp, the creator of the Jerk(ette) program was recently interviewed on FOX news about the military's use of the program. See the interview on the Jerk website. Click this link to the homepage, then scroll down to the middle of the page for the interview link. Link: FOX interview

News For Couples

The popular internet dating site E-Harmony is delving into the marital world by offering a new "marriage wellness service." For $75, couples can fill out a 310-item online questionnaire concerning communication, romance, sex and other topics. You then receive a computer-processed marriage profile that points out strengths and possible problem areas.


Know someone who could use a little RelationSmarts? Feel free to forward the newsletter to family and friends!

May your relationships bring you happiness,

Jennifer Oikle, Ph.D.

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