week, we'll be delivering smart and fresh relating
tips. We know you are busy, so let these quick ideas inspire
you to create your ideal relationship! Each edition will include
helpful information in these three categories:
- Dating – tips on finding and keeping the
- Mating – take the Passion Perks challenge
and perk up your love life!
- Relating – tips on making your connection
Be sure to scroll down and
check out news of note and announcements for singles and couples!
We'll be keeping you abreast of relationship happenings
you may find useful.
SINGLES! Lots of new exciting
opportunities for upcoming programs and events! Don't Miss
out!! See below for details...
Does an article strike a chord
or remind you of a friend's situation? Please pass Relation
Smarts on! Everyone deserves to have more love in their life!
Remember, information is only good if you USE it. Research
shows that if you don't use a new piece of information within
two weeks, you won't ever use it! So if you want an extraordinary
relationship, try something new today!
Us This Week!
Love Along the Broken Road: A Revolutionary New Approach to
October 19th, 6:30-9:30, Lakewood, $20/$25
for more info!
Dating: But… “I Love Him/Her”
I hear this refrain ALL the time:
“But I LOVE him/her.” In fact, I used this excuse
to keep me clinging to a 5 year relationship that should have
ended in 5 weeks! But let’s all get clear on one very
important fact: when we are using this statement to stay in
or return to a BAD relationship (hint: one that causes us
pain) – we are deluding ourselves. Why? Because real
love, healthy love, mature love (the kind of love we should
all be striving for) doesn’t cause
us pain. Oh sure, true love may include an occasional needle
prick pain, or skinned knee pain- but any so called “love”
that involves regular doses of tearful, nail biting, tear
your hair out, back stabbing, or feeling it in the pit of
your stomach pain is not really love at all. Honestly. It
may FEEL like love to you, but it is not. Very far from it
This kind of “love” is actually your
wound, from a long time ago. You see, when you have a less
than stellar childhood, frequently, you’ll come out
with a neediness that is often mistaken for “love.”
This neediness will cause you to confuse painful relationships
with “love.” In fact, for you, maybe love has
always been bound up with some degree of pain, hurt, rejection,
confusion, loneliness, guilt, or anger. And when you feel
that again in your latest romantic relationship- you’re
apt to draw the erroneous conclusion that this is love. Unfortunately,
for people with this background, the more rejection and hurt
they experience- the more “love” they feel. It’s
a bastard trick really. Especially since when two wounded
people get together- this “love” can stick like
glue- hurting each other back and forth, with no one having
the courage to leave the relationship.
Action Step: So, what’s
a love blind girl or guy to do? Recognize that these intense
feelings of “love” do not represent healthy, good
love. Remind yourself that any love that hurts is really your
Relation Tip: Think
that maybe your love hurts too much? Ask a good friend for
his or her honest opinion. And see if your gut agrees. Then
ACT on it. Don't drag it out....so that 5 weeks turns into
Coupling Connection specializes
in helping you kick the habit of hurtful love. Email
for more info!
A Gentleman Says, "After You"
Want one solid key to improving your
sex life? Make this your mantra: She comes first. For so many
reasons. Not the least of which is that after orgasm, men
release a hormone that makes them sleepy! When she comes first,
both parties' satisfaction is guaranteed!
Passion Perks Challenge:
Try making this a habit.
Relation Tip: Want to
learn more? Check out Ian Kerner's books here,
She's Comes First and He Comes Next.
I Wanna Hold Your Hand!
The Beatles sang about it, teenagers in puppy love
do it, but when was the last time you reached out and held
your partner's hand? Chances are, it's been awhile. But new
research suggests that partners who hold hands experience
more than increased connection- they also feel more safe and
secure, a biological response which induces relaxation and
reduces stress hormones that can dampen your immune system.
Wow- who knew that an act as simple as holding hands can make
you happier and healthier! But wait, there's more. Holding
hands in public is also a sign of commitment
and affection, which boosts your bond.
Action Step: What's
stopping you? Next time you're out in public with your sweetie,
strengthen your heart and your health, by holding hands.
Trouble Meeting the One?
like most singles, you have a hard time meeting the right
kind of person to date. If you're serious about finding The
One and ready to try something new, consider a matchmaker!
Ignite Matchmaking is headed by Denver based Sheryl Williams,
a trusted partner of Coupling Connection. She's passionate
about finding a mate for you! Check out her website for more
info: Ignite Match
*Brand New Group Opportunity*
Trans from your life
and find your soul mate!
in The One
Singles Study Group
(6 month weekly, teleclass or In-person
Are you really serious about finding your soul mate?
Are you finally ready to remove all obstacles to finding your
Can you commit to a process that will transform your life?
The focus of this group is to study and implement
Katherine Woodward Thomas’ program in her book: Calling
in the One: 7 weeks to Attract The Love Of Your Life.
Cost: $10 per session, billed $40 per month.
Don’t settle for a bad relationship or for
being alone! Your soul mate is out there and is waiting for
you! Transform your life from the inside out, and you will
us Next Week! Co-Ed
Savvy Singles Book Club!
at Peaberry Coffee, Cherry Creek, 2nd and St. Paul
Falling in Love For All the Right Reasons (by E-Harmony founder)
don't even need to read the book! To join or learn more visit:
NEW Date* Coupling
the STAND OUT Internet Dating
the Attention You Deserve
October 24th, 7-8:15pm
Join us for a look at the most common
profile mistakes and learn how to craft a profile that will
get you noticed!
for more info or to register!
Date Smart! Keys to Dating Smarter, Not Harder
Using the Secrets of the Law of Attraction to Stay Positive
and Find Your Perfect Partner
October 30, 7:30pm, Mountain Time, (9:30
Learn more here: Date
that glitters may turn to "gold" when 800 singles
(38 & over) deck out in gowns and tuxes to attend the
5th annual Black Tie Harvest Moon Ball on Saturday October
21 from 7:00 to 12:30 am at the Denver Marriott City Center
Colorado Ballroom, 18th & California.
Advance tickets for women are no longer available,
but they are still available for men! Women can still purchase
at the door.. Tickets are $48.00 in advance, $58.00 at the
door. For more information or advanced tickets call 303-649-9125,
or check www.partiesbymarty.com.
Dr. Jenn will be there- Hope to see YOU there! Don't
miss the BIGGEST singles party
all year long!!
Tips for Good Loving
Check out the website www.lovingyou.com
for ongoing, fresh ideas on how to keep your love alive!
*NEW* Couples Inventory:
Bulletproof Your Love
Whether or not your relationship is
currently in trouble, it can help to identify your love's
strengths and weaknesses. Doing this can prevent trouble down
the road by addressing small issues before they become large.
Or if things are less than ideal now, it can help you tackle
the big problems so you can bring passion, romance, and connection
back into your life. Cost: $75 per couple,
$60 for Individual
for more info.
* Have you tried
a tip or tool from the Relation Smarts E-newsletter? We want
to hear about it!? Let us know what your experience was like.
Did it improve your connection? Or no?
Email us! *
Do you have a
topic, idea, question, or concern you'd like to have addressed
in an upcoming newsletter? Email
Know someone who could use a little RelationSmarts?
Feel free to forward the newsletter to family and friends!
May your relationships bring you the happiness you
Jennifer Oikle, Ph.D.
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